The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
