Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
