If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
