Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.