your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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