the new term for farting is butt boxing.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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