found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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