2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
