I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
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I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
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...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.