plz talk dirty to me
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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