after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
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