I think I died a long time ago.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
