I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize