In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
