im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
if i died would you start the facebook group?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
