Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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