i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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