Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
