The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
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