P.S. I can't hear my feet
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
