I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
