I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
