Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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