Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize