Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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