Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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