After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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