Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
