i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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