the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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