sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
