I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
