its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
