I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize