You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize