32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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