i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You made out with two different species that night
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
