I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
