Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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