i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
