just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
