Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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