covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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