honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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