Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
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