I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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