Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
