Non-Jews are for practice
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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