I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
