Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
