But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
